Lost but not Found
by DotsbeyondStars
Summary: Inspired from the song Wings by Birdy. Elizabeth wakes up disoriented and something doesn't feel right. PruxHun. ONESHOT - please be cautious. There are a few cursed words written here -


_Tip: Please listen to Birdy's song: Wings. I was able to come up with this story because of this song. It's so beautiful. T^T_

* * *

[Intro]

Have you ever seen how the sun usually sets in a good day? It is warm and bright, magnificent and de-stressing, but not today. The heavens are crying upon the land that had just been stained with blood and death. Ripped flags waving by the cold, dusty wind that feels like The Ripper just passing by collecting numbers of soulless soldiers lying still in the foul soil — except for one.

There she is lying still but somehow breathing. Her face slightly covered by her hair that was stained with mud and her own blood. Her eyes are half open but only a bit of life can be seen from them and she is staring to nowhere thinking life had finally got her; that it is probably the time to give up and be free from humanity and their greed. She is starting to get tired after all.

Her breathing starts to get shallow and her eyes are getting heavier and heavier. She closes them —

I open my eyes.

 _Sunlight comes creeping in_

 _Illuminates our skin_

 _We watch the day go by_

 _Stories of all we did_

I sit up heavily and my head begins to throb like hell. What happened? Is this some huge hangover?

My lower back begins to feel sore and it worsens when I touch it. I might have slept too long enough to give me a bedsore. Then, I stare at the walls for a couple of minutes trying to sort things out. Something is missing; something is definitely odd.

 _It made me think of you_

 _It made me think of_ you

What day is it?

Everything is so blurry and quiet at that. Is it the day of the war? Has the battle ended?

I look around the bedroom from where I am sitting to see if everything is still and real. One thing is for sure: I am in Ludwig's guest's room. I guess that's a good start. We talked about staying here for the night before the war and I remember how amazed I was to see that every corner of this room is as white as snow and how everything is in its place. However, today feels different. It feels so heavy and too pure at the same time. The atmosphere is eerie and odd that gives me a bit of that anxiety.

I stand up and my legs begin to shake out of weakness. If it weren't for that bedside table, with nothing to hold onto, I would've fell down.

 _Under a trillion stars_

 _We danced on top of cars_

I open the door and it welcomes me to the hallway. Everything is white from the ceiling to the marbled floor. Rows of huge, mullion windows stand magnificently on the left side of the room allowing the sun to shine it's light in every corner of the corridor. Each of the windowpanes are dressed with thin curtains in shades of pearl with a cut in the middle to somehow allow the sun to take a peek inside the hall, but whether these curtains are completely closed or half opened, the light can still enter those thin fabrics which can still give the room a bit of that glow. Down on what I am standing on is a long, narrow — with hints of gold on each side — red carpet leading you the way to another exit to this room. I remember it being vibrant in color but today seems to be not the day for it for it was so pale and out ofd tune.

 _Took pictures of the stage_

 _So far from where we are_

I approach the beautifully crafted white table beside the center window of this hall. There, on the other end of it, rests a vase filled with white roses, which wasn't there before. I go closer and I notice that one rose was different from the rest. We all know that usually this flower only has one color: pink, red or white. This one, however, has a mix of both – the red and the white. The colors aren't even distributed evenly; in fact it looks like someone poured red paint on it poorly or someone's blood splattered on it.

 _They made me think of you_

 _They made me think of you_

"Blood," I thought to myself. I reach out for the flower just wanting to feel its texture using my pale fingertips. Suddenly —

 _Oh let's go down_

 _In the moment we're lost and found_

 _I just want to be by your side_

 _If this wings could fly_

—Flashback—

We were all drunk in the living room; all high from the alcohol that we used to refuel our body every minute or so. The next day, the second war will begin so we chose not care about the world at that time because that will be the last night for us to be happy with everyone still by our side— alive. So, why not go and enjoy it before our lives go in a 50/50 state tomorrow?

 _Him_ and I were laughing our asses out about non-sense things while Ludwig kept on drinking his beers, bottoms up much to our surprise. Feliciano was dancing happily with Kiku on his side swaying with his rhythm but in a tired and drunk way.

It was time to finally get some rest and _he_ accompanied me to my room. Ludwig, who was still in his good posture, took care of Feliciano and Kiku who were already out of the moment from all the strong beer that Germany had given that night.

I opened the door and said my thanks.

"Get some rest Liz and I hope to see you well and oriented tomorrow," he told me in a serious tone as his unique, crimson eyes gazed upon me. I didn't say anything rather I just looked back at him silently.

I guess he noticed that I was staring. So, he cut off the silence between us and said, "This will be our last and I hope for the best of us," and he grinned. I looked at him without saying a word again. He gave out a deep sigh and said, "Good night, Lizzy,"

"Our last," I thought. I hope it will be. "Good night, Gilbert," I responded back with a weak smile.

 _For the rest of our lives_

Gil…

 _I'm in a foreign state_

 _My thoughts they slip away_

I am panicking as I quickly walk to the living room hoping that he would be there. My heart is on a race, beating damn hard and fast. I can't get so much air that I have to breathe in as much I could from all this worrying plus, I can't think straight, I can't. I am getting more and more anxious and I do not like what I am feeling.

 _My words are leaving me_

 _They caught an aeroplane_

I enter the living room and everything is still there except for that certain loud voice. Before my heart beats it's way up to my throat, a long sound of an aircraft's engine roars from the outside of this house and as it goes nearer, it's sound gets louder. I look outside the window and there, up in the sky, is a war aircraft about a hundred feet high passing by peacefully; gliding through those fluffy clouds in a sunny day.

I watch it fly and my anxiety begins to slowly fade away as the gaps of my memory are slowly patching their way back to it's lane. As soon as it did, my heart begins to drop a thousand feet down.

The door cracks open. I look back slowly — with great disinterest — to see who it is. Ludwig stands in shock when he saw me standing there awake from my who-know-how-long sleep. After seconds of staring at each other, his shoulders begin to loosen up and he looks at me seriously. He is trying so hard – trying so hard to be strong.

I guess he noticed how stressed and how broken I am. How I refuse to believe what I am starting to remember. I can tell that he knows this as he was starting to look like he was ready to explain everything but not until I speak first.

"Where is he, Ludwig?" I asked in a calm and firm voice as much as possible hoping to get a good answer from him.

 _Because I thought of you_

He betrays me.

 _Just from the thought of you_

"I will ask again, Ludwig. Where is h—?!

-Flashback—

 _Oh let's go down_

"—he?!" I shouted angrily at Ludwig. Suddenly, a bomb fell about 10 km away from us.

BOOM.

 _In the moment we're lost and found_

Huge debris flew in different directions. We covered ourselves avoiding to get hit and get killed. When everything settled down, I heard numbers of our men screaming and crying from pain and I didn't dare to look at them. Every fiber in my body was already hurting and I knew how many of my soldiers were dead. I don't want to add that physical pain to my emotions anymore because I had enough especially at that moment when I couldn't find Gilbert.

"Dammit!" I hissed. We were losing the battle; we had to retreat, but I couldn't go back if that fool was not there with us — with me.

 _I just want to be by your side_

 _If these wings could fly_

In the midst of the shooting, I decided to go look for him. I abandoned my station and ran back to the town. Feliciano called out to me and asked where I was going.

"I am going to look for Gilbert. I am going to meet you back in our camp and I am expecting all of you to be well and alive. Tell Ludwig," I told him and I scurried off. I did not even bother to see what Feliciano's reaction or tried to hear what he has to say.

"I have to look for him," that was all in my mind as I was running by the rubbles of a small town that was wrecked from the endless bombings. Oh god, I would've killed him myself for leaving us behind without even telling us.

Gilbert was a fool – always has been. He should've at least called one of us to accompany him to at least watch his back. I knew how powerful he was; he had a kingdom after all, but reality is still reality. Life doesn't always gives you rainbows and confetti for the rest of your life. There will always be a dark point. Unfortunately, the saying "Life is a bitch" is true because when it finally decides to go against you, it hits you two times fold than it was throwing you fucking gold bars and diamonds.

 _Oh damn these walls_

 _In the moment we're ten feet tall_

"Gil!" I shouted several times as I searched for him. I was a few kilometers away from where the battle was, but the place where I was at had had already been affected by the war. Two-story houses that were made of bricks may or may not still have their remains intact. Fragments of those buildings were all over the street and dead bodies can be seen from there to there - civilians and soldiers.

All of a sudden, someone was firing at me. I hid behind that big rock, avoiding to get shot. "Shit," I cursed. When the fire went down, I positioned my gun, peeked and targeted that son of a gun. A cry echoed from where the firing seemed to start signaling that I was able to hit that guy. So, I continued my hunt for the awesome.

 _And how you told me after it all_

 _We'd remember tonight_

Not so long after that small firing session, I finally saw him hiding behind a wall. It seems that he had his own battle because guns were firing back and forth. So, I had to duck and crawl towards him. "GIL!" I called out. "Liz!" he replied with a surprise.

"What the fuck are you doing here?! " I asked really intending to sound pissed.

"What do you think am I doing?" he answered back sounding like he was talking to an idiot.

"No! I mean… fuck. We have to go back, Gil. We're losing. We have to go!" I told him – pissed as ever.

"It's time for us to rest. We have to stop, Gil. This is enough," I pleaded.

For a second, he thought about it. He suddenly stood up, rested his machine gun on the top of our barricade, took an aim and opened fire. I had to cover my ears to protect it from those loud blasts.

Silence took over and I looked up at him. He caught me eyeing at him and all he did was return it. He dropped his weapon — without even bulging — and just continued to look at me with his deep crimson eyes and it wasn't dreamy or the likes that shit stories would fantasize about. It was like he was bleeding from the inside. Just that moment I knew that he was also in pain—we all were. I stood up and told him that we have to leave before this gets worse, before our bodies can't handle it any longer. He nods with agreement, but with huge disappointment.

We were rushing back towards our base, but, of course, it wasn't that easy. We had a few encounters from the Allies' soldiers. Some had guns that we were able to kill, luckily, and some just stupidly charged at us with a stab knife in one hand. We had our share when it comes to fighting without any of these machines when we were young. So, it wasn't a big deal for us.

I pulled that string, turned around anticipating another soldier charging at me. He was a tad too late in killing me when I hit his head hardly with the handle of my gun that possibly gave him a good contusion just enough to knock him out. Gilbert kicked his rival on his stomach to the ground and silenced him with his Walther PP gun – merciless.

 _For the rest of our lives_

 _[Interlude]_

We looked at each other and nodded. "It's nice fighting with you again," He told me with a smile probably remembering those ancient times. I will never forget those days; when he knew my real identity before I did, when he did not bother to sexually harass me when I was at my worse state, rather, he gave me clothing to hide my skin and those endless teasing that made me want to rip his hair off and send him home crying. I just couldn't imagine life without Prussia — I cannot. He is my significant other; my best friend probably even more. And I was glad he was okay. I was glad that I was there to watch over him and vice versa.

When I thought all of those things, it gave me mixed feelings about our relationship. I always knew how Roderich would always be the one for me, but the thing I have for Gilbert is different — special. Maybe that was normal for soldiers like us in a combat; everyone seems to matter.

"Let's go home," I replied back. He offered me his hand, waiting for me to hold it. I looked at his hand and back at him. I smiled with a sigh. We would do that together once again. We would watch each other's back like the old times and we would go home safe and sound.

 _If these wings could fly_

However, I spoke too soon.

 _Oh, let's go down_

When I was about to reach out for his hand, a pebble moved and our attention was caught on guard. When we looked at the source from where the sound came from, out of nowhere — just out of nowhere — a man grabbed Gilbert's shoulders and before I could even shout, he hugged Gil and gave him a surprising unwanted gift — He stabbed Gil right above his diaphragm.

 _In the moment we're lost and found_

I couldn't speak. I was helpless; _he_ was helpless. Much worse than that was when that man couldn't get enough from it that he twisted his knife to his heart's content enough to make Gil cry in pain. I could tell that he was severely bleeding inside and how his lungs were damaged; blood dripped out from his nose and mouth.

 _I just want to be your side_

Shortly, I saw his body loosen up. His eyes, that was on fire, turned cold and lifeless. His hands, that wanted to hold mine just a minute ago, grew weak. His legs started to give up. The Russian soldier finally withdrew his dagger and dropped Gil down. I stared at his body hoping to see a slight movement or call me out and say his last few words just like any other stories would. Much to my dismay, he just held his last breath and his chest stopped rising.

 _If these wings could fly_

I looked down at him, speechless. I did not know what to do or what to say. I couldn't scream nor can I move. One drop of tear finally made it's way outside and that was all I needed. However, when I was about to cry out, before that tear even reached halfway on my cheek, I felt a painful hit just behind my head – blackout.

—Flashback ended—

 _Oh damn these walls_

 _In the moment we're ten feet tall_

Ludwig told me everything. He told me about how they saw Gil and I on the ground lifeless. How they carried us to our base to get us revived, how they were able to save me … and how it was too late for _him_.

I was in a coma for 2 months, slowly recovering. Miraculously, here I am, alive once again with one thing missing. I then wondered why life has given me another chance to live if it would only bring me pain — Pain of loosing someone where in I could have been free from it if I hadn't had recovered. It hurts… it hurts.

Ludwig brought me to Gil's house and left me there alone for a moment so that I could have some privacy with his brother and I appreciated that a lot. I look around, heavy at heart, to see what what's left of his property — nothing. Gil, his house and his achievements will only be just a part of history now.

At the center of this ruin stands a wooden cross and beneath it lays his body. Heavy regretful memories are starting to buildup one by one and my heart begins to crumble. However, I remain firm and collected, but anyone would be a fool to believe that. Anyone could tell how broken I am from how my tired eyes are swelling and from the tears that keeps on falling down my cheeks non-stop.

 _And how you told me after it all_

 _We'd remember tonight_

I hold onto his necklace that had a cross on it. Ludwig found it broken near to his brother's body when they spotted us and he decided to give it to me for some reason. I looked at it and remembered what he told me on that last peaceful night. "That was our last," I told him hoping his soul could hear me.

"Goodbye, Gil" I added in despair and cried.

"I love you, Gil,"

 _For the rest of our lives_


End file.
